Harry
Tash Jayasinghe
CibbuanoDo you want a storybook wedding?
April 29th 2008 04:05
Let me modify that: I don't like what weddings have become. I've only been to a few and some of them have bordered on narcissism.
The Guardian has an interesting article on the rising popularity of fantasy weddings, where the entire lavish spectacle mimics some grand illusion that allows the wedding to exists in a hallucinatory state.
The article talks entirely about brides designing their weddings to reflect their fantasy wedding - I've written about this before, on the topic of Bridezilla - or the Bride from Hell.
I suppose my second-biggest problem is the self-centered attitude of the bride, pivoting the entire event on herself, dragging it on with announcement parties, engagement parties, hen's nights, rehersals... all for the purpose of being at the center of attention. Well, the Guardian says it better:
"Why, then, do intelligent young women have fairytale fantasies about their wedding days, and go to such lengths to make them a reality? "Because they intend to structure the whole of their future emotional selves with reference to this day," posits Vikki Bell, professor of sociology at Goldsmiths, University of London."
"...I've never seen a groom so complacent. He just went with it."
"This may explain why actress Jennifer Ellison is one of countless women planning (and booking) their wedding ceremony venues - hers at Luttrellstown Castle - before even meeting their groom."
"Women are predominantly driving the fantasy marriage movement. Roe-Hartley says that 95% of the arrangements are made by the bride-to-be."
But my biggest problem with these insane weddings is the sheer consumerism that they drive. Your fantasies are hardly unique or special. They've been marketed to you, and you've happily bought into it:
"...in 2006, the bridal segment of the Disney corporation brought in 6.4% of its $34.3bn total revenue."
"The price for predictability is rocketing. The average couple last year clocked up an £18,000 wedding bill. That's 30 times higher than the average cost in 1950, which in today's terms was £600."
To be honest, I don't actually know any women that would go to these lengths. Most of the women that I know are fantastically down to earth and treat their partner as an equal, opting for frugal, honest weddings, with a small group of friends and family.
Who are the women in these articles? Are you one? Leave a comment!
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Comment by Journeywoman
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Comment by Nick Bendel
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Many weddings, in my opinion, are exorbitant, egocentric extravaganzas, which completely miss the point. A wedding should be about the union of two soulmates, rather than crass self-promotion.
If you're desperate to be the centre of attention, why not throw a big party? That way, you can enjoy the spotlight, without turning something so sacred into something so demeaning.
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If u recall my series of posts from engagement rings tothe day...u know that I share the same view -- that in most cases yes,
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And if anyone has ever caught any of those brides from hell tv programes, why would you really want to marry someone that materialistic or crazy??