Harry
CibbuanoNotches on the bedpost - how many people have YOU slept with?
September 28th 2006 01:14
The other day I was asked, “how many people have you slept with?” I think I shocked them with my response of, “not too sure.”
Its not that I’ve slept with a whole bunch of people, or that I hit the town, get smashed and never really know what I’ve done with someone I’ve meet. Its just that I don’t keep a running scorecard. If I really wanted to I could list every single sexual partner I’ve had. But with my memory committing that number to memory and then updating time every time I add another stroke to the scorecard… agh, it’s just too much of a hassle.
What’s the big deal anyway? Do I get a prize when I hit double digits?
“Congratulations, you’ve hit double digits and here’s your prize, a hardy dose of chlamydia.”
It’s a pretty bizarre question. In my experience I’ve never found any relationship with number of sexual partners and sexual prowess. Some of the newbies have been far more skilled than the experienced studs. As far as I’m concerned the only number that really matters is zero. Sex with a virgin is a completely different ball park. Once the proverbial cherry has been popped, I don’t see where previous partners really figures.
The other thing that occurred to me was that clearly there are people that keep a running tally of sexual conquests. Sure its not too hard to keep on top of the first couple relationships but surely you reach a point of time where the numbers just turn into a mush and you’re better off adopting ranges. The other factor that gets me stumped is the definitions. Fine sex is sex, but is a blowjob full points or half points? Is a threesome double points? If I give my vibrator a name can I add it to the list?
I decided to have a bit of fun with this guy, who was obviously stunned that I didn’t have some magical ideal number. I asked if he could be more specific with what he meant by “sleeping with” and “people.” He seemed a little puzzled by this response but before he had a chance to reply I fired over some more enquiries.
“What about pets? Some people view their pets as equals with fellow people. And how about things found in your refrigerator? Should I be making some sort of allowance? Although I guess that would be in the ‘how many inanimate objects have you slept with’ category.”
He excused himself soon afterwards. Obviously, a bloke that couldn’t take a joke or recognize sarcasm. For the record, no animals were harmed in the making of this post.
Its not that I’ve slept with a whole bunch of people, or that I hit the town, get smashed and never really know what I’ve done with someone I’ve meet. Its just that I don’t keep a running scorecard. If I really wanted to I could list every single sexual partner I’ve had. But with my memory committing that number to memory and then updating time every time I add another stroke to the scorecard… agh, it’s just too much of a hassle.
What’s the big deal anyway? Do I get a prize when I hit double digits?
“Congratulations, you’ve hit double digits and here’s your prize, a hardy dose of chlamydia.”
It’s a pretty bizarre question. In my experience I’ve never found any relationship with number of sexual partners and sexual prowess. Some of the newbies have been far more skilled than the experienced studs. As far as I’m concerned the only number that really matters is zero. Sex with a virgin is a completely different ball park. Once the proverbial cherry has been popped, I don’t see where previous partners really figures.
The other thing that occurred to me was that clearly there are people that keep a running tally of sexual conquests. Sure its not too hard to keep on top of the first couple relationships but surely you reach a point of time where the numbers just turn into a mush and you’re better off adopting ranges. The other factor that gets me stumped is the definitions. Fine sex is sex, but is a blowjob full points or half points? Is a threesome double points? If I give my vibrator a name can I add it to the list?
I decided to have a bit of fun with this guy, who was obviously stunned that I didn’t have some magical ideal number. I asked if he could be more specific with what he meant by “sleeping with” and “people.” He seemed a little puzzled by this response but before he had a chance to reply I fired over some more enquiries.
“What about pets? Some people view their pets as equals with fellow people. And how about things found in your refrigerator? Should I be making some sort of allowance? Although I guess that would be in the ‘how many inanimate objects have you slept with’ category.”
He excused himself soon afterwards. Obviously, a bloke that couldn’t take a joke or recognize sarcasm. For the record, no animals were harmed in the making of this post.
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