Harry
CibbuanoOnline Dating Disasters
April 28th 2006 04:21
I’ve always been skeptical of this whole online dating thing. I know its prudish and I suppose there’s no reason why you can’t meet the love of your life online. I guess I’ve just heard one too many horror stories. I found these two very different tales amusing.
Suh, who immigrated from Korea to the United States during his teen years, felt an immediate friendship connection with Yujin whom he met online. They spent a few months chatting online and on the telephone, in both Korean and English.
Then, Suh and a few of his friends decided to visit Yujin in New York. The two met in Manhattan and spent the afternoon in Central Park. After dinner, they went to a Karaoke bar. They had a wonderful time, he says, but he thought of her more as a sister than a girlfriend.
They continued to keep in touch through the Internet. When she was getting ready to graduate, she told Suh her family, who lives in Korea, would not be able to make it to the ceremony. Suh decided to drive up to New York, this time without his friends, so she wouldn’t be alone.
Afterward, the two again traveled to Manhattan.
“I was ready to get a motel room when she said, ‘Don’t worry about getting a motel room; you can just stay at my place.’ I was like OK, that’s cool,” Suh says.
Yujin lived in a studio near Amherst. Exhausted from walking all day, Suh just wanted to go some place to get some rest. They sat on her bed, just watching television; then, Suh fell asleep. When he woke up in the middle of the night, his friend was completely naked.
“It happened in the middle of the night so I couldn’t go to a motel or anything,” Suh says. “I just moved down on the floor and I just fell asleep there.”
But she followed him to the floor. Suh headed straight for the bathroom.
He says: “I locked myself in and then I fell asleep in the bathtub.”
Early in the morning, Suh left her studio and checked himself into a motel. He slept for a couple of hours, and then went back to Yujin’s studio to say goodbye.
“I told her I didn’t want anything more than a friendship,” Suh says. “She was nice. She had features that I looked for in a woman. Long black hair. Soft hands. Very sweet.
“I should of, could of, would of, but it was wrong and I didn’t expect anything more than just a friendship. She took it as, ‘Why would a guy drive all the way from Virginia to New York to see a girl unless he had something on his mind?’”
* * *
James Nguyen, 22, a Chinese-Vietnamese American, is a fourth year economics major at California State University, Hayward. Two years ago he chatted with “hundreds” of women online — and out of those, he went out on dates with about 10, ranging from 19 to 22 years old, all of them Asian Americans.
“Most of my efforts were on AOL,” he says. “That is where I pimped on a lot of my girls.”
He says the main reason to chat was to meet the opposite sex and to fool around. He wasn’t looking for a long-term relationship — or even a friendship.
“For online dating, I’m looking for physical relationships and instant gratification,” he says. “I’m into physical beauty. If I’m attracted to them then the date is good. If not, the date is bad.”
Nguyen says he sometimes exchanges pictures before a date, but not always. From his experience, people who do not send pictures aren’t necessarily beautiful or ugly.
“All the girls complain about their body and are insecure about their looks,” he says.
On the other hand, one time he met a woman who complained about the way she looked and refused to give her photo. “I thought she was just exaggerating, but when I did meet up with her she was … uh … actually telling the truth,” Nguyen says.
Some of Nguyen’s first face-to-face dates took place just hours after their initial online chats. Other times, Nguyen built the online relationships for a few months and talked to them on the phone before their first physical encounter.
“In my experience, girls generally don’t say, ‘Oh let’s go meet up.’ So the guys have to say, ‘Oh, let’s meet on the phone’ or ‘let’s go meet up at a certain place,’” Nguyen says.
About half of his encounters have been what he considers “horrible” dates with women he’s not attracted to.
“If it’s a bad date, I usually just end up driving her around because I don’t want to spend any money on her. Then I just drop her off,” Nguyen says.
A so-called “player,” Nguyen says online chatting is the perfect pick-up place for him.
“You got to enjoy typing to meet girls and you have to be patient — it’s a lot like fishing,” he says.
Now, however, Nguyen says his online “pimping” days are over because he’s looking for a serious relationship.
Nguyen says: “There were a lot of bad dates because they were ugly and some good dates, but I don’t regret it because you got to try it at least once.”
Suh, who immigrated from Korea to the United States during his teen years, felt an immediate friendship connection with Yujin whom he met online. They spent a few months chatting online and on the telephone, in both Korean and English.
Then, Suh and a few of his friends decided to visit Yujin in New York. The two met in Manhattan and spent the afternoon in Central Park. After dinner, they went to a Karaoke bar. They had a wonderful time, he says, but he thought of her more as a sister than a girlfriend.
Afterward, the two again traveled to Manhattan.
“I was ready to get a motel room when she said, ‘Don’t worry about getting a motel room; you can just stay at my place.’ I was like OK, that’s cool,” Suh says.
Yujin lived in a studio near Amherst. Exhausted from walking all day, Suh just wanted to go some place to get some rest. They sat on her bed, just watching television; then, Suh fell asleep. When he woke up in the middle of the night, his friend was completely naked.
“It happened in the middle of the night so I couldn’t go to a motel or anything,” Suh says. “I just moved down on the floor and I just fell asleep there.”
But she followed him to the floor. Suh headed straight for the bathroom.
Early in the morning, Suh left her studio and checked himself into a motel. He slept for a couple of hours, and then went back to Yujin’s studio to say goodbye.
“I told her I didn’t want anything more than a friendship,” Suh says. “She was nice. She had features that I looked for in a woman. Long black hair. Soft hands. Very sweet.
“I should of, could of, would of, but it was wrong and I didn’t expect anything more than just a friendship. She took it as, ‘Why would a guy drive all the way from Virginia to New York to see a girl unless he had something on his mind?’”
* * *
James Nguyen, 22, a Chinese-Vietnamese American, is a fourth year economics major at California State University, Hayward. Two years ago he chatted with “hundreds” of women online — and out of those, he went out on dates with about 10, ranging from 19 to 22 years old, all of them Asian Americans.
“Most of my efforts were on AOL,” he says. “That is where I pimped on a lot of my girls.”
He says the main reason to chat was to meet the opposite sex and to fool around. He wasn’t looking for a long-term relationship — or even a friendship.
“For online dating, I’m looking for physical relationships and instant gratification,” he says. “I’m into physical beauty. If I’m attracted to them then the date is good. If not, the date is bad.”
Nguyen says he sometimes exchanges pictures before a date, but not always. From his experience, people who do not send pictures aren’t necessarily beautiful or ugly.
“All the girls complain about their body and are insecure about their looks,” he says.
On the other hand, one time he met a woman who complained about the way she looked and refused to give her photo. “I thought she was just exaggerating, but when I did meet up with her she was … uh … actually telling the truth,” Nguyen says.
Some of Nguyen’s first face-to-face dates took place just hours after their initial online chats. Other times, Nguyen built the online relationships for a few months and talked to them on the phone before their first physical encounter.
“In my experience, girls generally don’t say, ‘Oh let’s go meet up.’ So the guys have to say, ‘Oh, let’s meet on the phone’ or ‘let’s go meet up at a certain place,’” Nguyen says.
About half of his encounters have been what he considers “horrible” dates with women he’s not attracted to.
“If it’s a bad date, I usually just end up driving her around because I don’t want to spend any money on her. Then I just drop her off,” Nguyen says.
A so-called “player,” Nguyen says online chatting is the perfect pick-up place for him.
“You got to enjoy typing to meet girls and you have to be patient — it’s a lot like fishing,” he says.
Now, however, Nguyen says his online “pimping” days are over because he’s looking for a serious relationship.
Nguyen says: “There were a lot of bad dates because they were ugly and some good dates, but I don’t regret it because you got to try it at least once.”
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Comment by stephen
I actually had a good erxperience the one and only time I met a girl on the internet, in my humble beginnings in Canberra.
We drank wine and made love like sea otters. Ahh those were the days.... *cough* ahem...anyway.
Comment by Cibbuano
Hunt Famous
Orble Post of the Day
Fat Cult
Techbreak
Comment by Bunbury
But having eye witnessed some of my flatmate's online dating encounters, I must say those stories aren't as bad as it could have gotten.
The most shocking time was when a guy pretended that he was a girl, and he kept sending naked pictures from porn sites to her, so that she can send some of herself back.
You're right to be cautious....i mean..ewww....
Comment by Stanley
yeah, those stories aren't so bad to be honest. there are much worse examples out there! i am sure some have involved satanic rituals, but that may be construed as a good date for some.
Comment by Camryn
Do you also get the girls to pay for your petrol if you dont like them?
Cheap skate.