First Dates – Who pays the bill?
November 30th 2006 00:42
When it comes to the first date, what is the general consensus with pay for the bills? Traditionally, it was always the male’s department to pick up the tab, but traditionally women were far more financially dependent on men too. Times have changed, have the rules of dating etiquette moved with the times?
If you are a female and you can finance your end of a date then you’re an absolute scrooge if you don’t offer to pay your share on a first date. I stress the notion of offering. If a guy feels it is his duty/need/desire to pay I don’t believe in making a fuss and insisting on paying. There is something very sweet about an old school style date where a guy treats you to a nice dinner, a cocktail or a movie. However, I think that by having someone pay for a date that should oblige you to offer services behave in a manor that you’re not comfortable with. This is generally why I prefer to pay for my end of a date. Until I get to know the person, I don’t want to feel the sense of obligation that comes along with someone lavishing you with meals and entertainment.
There’s also an age and personal situation factor to consider. When you’ve got a full time establish job, shouting someone to an all expenses paid date isn’t such a big deal. For students scraping by on the poverty line, there has got to be a little more give and consideration.
What about the situation where the woman has initiated the date? Should she be expected to foot the bill? Generally, I think whoever initiates the date should be prepared to pay the entire bill for the date. You’re the one who is interested in the other person, so if you’re interested in getting know them better a small investment in a first date isn’t a big a deal. This rule applies for both men and women. If you asked someone on a date make sure you’ve got enough cash to cover both of you.
If you’ve been asked on a date, I believe it is good manners to offer to pay for your share of the date. The asker is well within their rights to insist that they pay for the whole date in which case it is fine to not pay, but I think it is inappropriate to not offer to split the bill.
No one like arguing over a bill, especially on a first date. If you offer to split the bill and the other person insists on covering the whole bill, accept the offer graciously. There’s no need to cause a fuss. The fact that you have offered to pay mitigates any sense of personal obligation or expectation. Should you still feel uncomfortable about someone paying for the entirety of your date maybe offer to cover the second date or pay for the post dinner drinks, movie or desert.
Paying can lead to some awkward situations on a date. How a person responds can also reveals a little bit about the character of the person. In modern dating etiquette it is fairly common to pay your own way on a first date. No matter who asked or what your gender, always make sure you’ve got some cash in your wallet.
If you are a female and you can finance your end of a date then you’re an absolute scrooge if you don’t offer to pay your share on a first date. I stress the notion of offering. If a guy feels it is his duty/need/desire to pay I don’t believe in making a fuss and insisting on paying. There is something very sweet about an old school style date where a guy treats you to a nice dinner, a cocktail or a movie. However, I think that by having someone pay for a date that should oblige you to offer services behave in a manor that you’re not comfortable with. This is generally why I prefer to pay for my end of a date. Until I get to know the person, I don’t want to feel the sense of obligation that comes along with someone lavishing you with meals and entertainment.
There’s also an age and personal situation factor to consider. When you’ve got a full time establish job, shouting someone to an all expenses paid date isn’t such a big deal. For students scraping by on the poverty line, there has got to be a little more give and consideration.
What about the situation where the woman has initiated the date? Should she be expected to foot the bill? Generally, I think whoever initiates the date should be prepared to pay the entire bill for the date. You’re the one who is interested in the other person, so if you’re interested in getting know them better a small investment in a first date isn’t a big a deal. This rule applies for both men and women. If you asked someone on a date make sure you’ve got enough cash to cover both of you.
If you’ve been asked on a date, I believe it is good manners to offer to pay for your share of the date. The asker is well within their rights to insist that they pay for the whole date in which case it is fine to not pay, but I think it is inappropriate to not offer to split the bill.
No one like arguing over a bill, especially on a first date. If you offer to split the bill and the other person insists on covering the whole bill, accept the offer graciously. There’s no need to cause a fuss. The fact that you have offered to pay mitigates any sense of personal obligation or expectation. Should you still feel uncomfortable about someone paying for the entirety of your date maybe offer to cover the second date or pay for the post dinner drinks, movie or desert.
Paying can lead to some awkward situations on a date. How a person responds can also reveals a little bit about the character of the person. In modern dating etiquette it is fairly common to pay your own way on a first date. No matter who asked or what your gender, always make sure you’ve got some cash in your wallet.
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