Harry
CibbuanoReading Signals
July 3rd 2006 00:49
One of the hardest things to figure out when you’ve just meet someone new is determining if they’re digging you as much as you are digging them. Dating could be some much easier if we all had an electronic display on our forehead flashing exactly what we were thinking about the person chatting to us. Unfortunately, dating and communicating with others in general is all wrapped up in these frustratingly difficult to decipher “signals.” When you’ve had a chance to get to know someone’s personality a little better reading these signals can be much easier. You’ll get to know how someone behaves when they are in certain moods or scenarios and can adjust your behaviour accordingly. When you’ve just met someone, reading the signals can be near impossible.
What makes reading the signals of a new dating interest so difficult is two fold. For starters there is the gender difference. Men and women think and behave differently and consequently interpret behaviours differently. What a man might think is flirting, a female may think is sleazy. And when some are feeling insecure, others will interpret as aloof, disinterest. So some might say that homosexual relationships have it easy. Men know how men think, women understand women. Well, perhaps to a certain degree but in reality, everyone thinks and interprets behaviours differently. Perhaps there can be certain generalizations made between the sexes but really you’re going to get a mixed bag of personalities within the homo and heterosexual communities of females and males.
So whilst we can’t ever be 100% certain what a new dating interest might be thinking of us, there are some signs and signals that may be able to help us figure out if we’re on a winning streak or heading down a road to nowhere. Over the next couple weeks, I’ll be looking at some of the more common signs that you get at the initial stages of dating or meeting new people that may help interpret where you are fitting on the other person’s radar.
First and foremost though, I think the best thing you can do is follow you gut feelings. If something feels weird, if you get the impression they’re not terribly interested you’re gut may be a good indication. Always give a new relationship a chance. Just because your gut tells you there is a lack of interest doesn’t mean its all over. You could be interpreting things wrongly, there may be other factors you don’t know about (people do wake up on the wrong side of the bed from time to time) or they may just be wary and need some time to totally warm up to you. The important thing to remember that if you are getting a gut feeling that things are not 100% sparking is to hang back a little, give it some time and not get too involved until you are certain things are great guns between you. Dip the toe in, don’t necessarily through the whole foot in.
What makes reading the signals of a new dating interest so difficult is two fold. For starters there is the gender difference. Men and women think and behave differently and consequently interpret behaviours differently. What a man might think is flirting, a female may think is sleazy. And when some are feeling insecure, others will interpret as aloof, disinterest. So some might say that homosexual relationships have it easy. Men know how men think, women understand women. Well, perhaps to a certain degree but in reality, everyone thinks and interprets behaviours differently. Perhaps there can be certain generalizations made between the sexes but really you’re going to get a mixed bag of personalities within the homo and heterosexual communities of females and males.
So whilst we can’t ever be 100% certain what a new dating interest might be thinking of us, there are some signs and signals that may be able to help us figure out if we’re on a winning streak or heading down a road to nowhere. Over the next couple weeks, I’ll be looking at some of the more common signs that you get at the initial stages of dating or meeting new people that may help interpret where you are fitting on the other person’s radar.
First and foremost though, I think the best thing you can do is follow you gut feelings. If something feels weird, if you get the impression they’re not terribly interested you’re gut may be a good indication. Always give a new relationship a chance. Just because your gut tells you there is a lack of interest doesn’t mean its all over. You could be interpreting things wrongly, there may be other factors you don’t know about (people do wake up on the wrong side of the bed from time to time) or they may just be wary and need some time to totally warm up to you. The important thing to remember that if you are getting a gut feeling that things are not 100% sparking is to hang back a little, give it some time and not get too involved until you are certain things are great guns between you. Dip the toe in, don’t necessarily through the whole foot in.
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