Harry
Tash Jayasinghe
CibbuanoRelationship Compatibility
November 28th 2006 00:47
Ask just about any seasoned veteran and they’ll tell you that the key to relationship bliss in the long-term is all about compatibility. But what exactly is compatibility? If you both like arthouse films and support the same footy team, will that necessarily translate to a lifetime of happiness? What exactly is compatibility and how can we determine if we’ve found someone who we’re compatible with? And is there any truth to the idea that opposites attract? Could someone completely incompatible actually be your lifetime soul mate?
If you’re thinking compatibility is all about liking the same sort of music and cuisine, guess again. There is a whole lot more to a relationship than sharing common interests. When it comes to breaking the ice and getting to know each other as well as forging some common activities to develop a bond, then yes, common interests are definitely important. I also think that it is important to bring something new and fresh to a relationship also. Think of a relationship like a communal feast. It is far more fun if along with the usual fare someone brings along a little extra exotic dish.
By broadening someone else’s experiences with your input, you can really add to the value of a relationship. It keeps things interesting which is where the ‘opposites attract’ idea comes from. Offering something different keeps people interested. Whether it be a different point of view, experience, attitude or way of doing something; the beauty of offering something different is that it is a refreshing experience. It offers the chance for someone to challenge themselves, it’s a means of exploring.
So being slightly different can definitely contribute to a relationship and its long term success. However, being complete polar opposites can lead to all sorts of issues and problems that may threaten the long term prospects of a relationship. There are certain core beliefs that any compatible couple should share. Our values and beliefs are constructed on our lifetime experiences. The way that we think about spirituality, religion, family and even politics form an enormous part of how we think about the world. In turn, these core values will also determine who we are going to be most comfortable sharing our lives with.
For the most part, people aren’t too pliable when it comes to their core beliefs. There’s little chance of converting a hardcore conservative into a liberal hippie. There may be a little bit of give, particularly when people are young and still forming an opinion about the world, but for the most part, if you are going to be compatible in the long term, you’ll need to be on the same page in term of your attitudes and values.
Polar opposites probably won’t survive a long term relationship. In the short term, I think they’ll sure to have a fun and vibrant sort of relationship but eventually those divides between personalities and values will start to eat at the core of a relationship’s stability. Couples that mirror each other will most likely have problems down the track too. There comes a time when everyone wants to be challenged and given something different. A partner who mimics your every thought, desire, interest and view is simply going to lead to boredom in the long term. The trick is finding someone who compliments you as well as brings that little bit extra.
If you’re thinking compatibility is all about liking the same sort of music and cuisine, guess again. There is a whole lot more to a relationship than sharing common interests. When it comes to breaking the ice and getting to know each other as well as forging some common activities to develop a bond, then yes, common interests are definitely important. I also think that it is important to bring something new and fresh to a relationship also. Think of a relationship like a communal feast. It is far more fun if along with the usual fare someone brings along a little extra exotic dish.
By broadening someone else’s experiences with your input, you can really add to the value of a relationship. It keeps things interesting which is where the ‘opposites attract’ idea comes from. Offering something different keeps people interested. Whether it be a different point of view, experience, attitude or way of doing something; the beauty of offering something different is that it is a refreshing experience. It offers the chance for someone to challenge themselves, it’s a means of exploring.
So being slightly different can definitely contribute to a relationship and its long term success. However, being complete polar opposites can lead to all sorts of issues and problems that may threaten the long term prospects of a relationship. There are certain core beliefs that any compatible couple should share. Our values and beliefs are constructed on our lifetime experiences. The way that we think about spirituality, religion, family and even politics form an enormous part of how we think about the world. In turn, these core values will also determine who we are going to be most comfortable sharing our lives with.
For the most part, people aren’t too pliable when it comes to their core beliefs. There’s little chance of converting a hardcore conservative into a liberal hippie. There may be a little bit of give, particularly when people are young and still forming an opinion about the world, but for the most part, if you are going to be compatible in the long term, you’ll need to be on the same page in term of your attitudes and values.
Polar opposites probably won’t survive a long term relationship. In the short term, I think they’ll sure to have a fun and vibrant sort of relationship but eventually those divides between personalities and values will start to eat at the core of a relationship’s stability. Couples that mirror each other will most likely have problems down the track too. There comes a time when everyone wants to be challenged and given something different. A partner who mimics your every thought, desire, interest and view is simply going to lead to boredom in the long term. The trick is finding someone who compliments you as well as brings that little bit extra.
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