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Relationship Breakers

November 1st 2006 01:02
When it comes to a committed intimate relationship what are the issues that are no compromise relationship breakers? What would your partner have to do to completely jeopardize your relationship?

A breach of trust and honesty would be high on my list of things that could potentially ruin a relationship. However, I’ve always considered myself to be relatively forgiving. It would be highly dependent on the circumstances but I wouldn’t list cheating as a definite relationship breaker. If there was a total lack of respect, little display of remorse or serial behaviour, well then I would adopt a ‘one strike and you’re out’ policy. I don’t believe in the once a cheater, always a cheater mantra. We can all make mistakes. Point of the matter, cheating isn’t necessarily on my list of deal breakers.


I’m still undecided about having kids. I tend to get clucky in cycles only to have some tantrum toddler in the local mall remind me that couples without kids are truly blessed. For those that do know their stance on kids, I could imagine that the future family plans could weigh in heavily on a relationship. If one half of a couple definitely wants kids and the other half definitely doesn’t want them, is there any point in following a long term relationship? Is it reasonable to expect someone to come around to your point of view given time?

Personally, I’m at a point in my life where I feel the need to get out and explore the world. I’ve worked hard at getting a degree and have put off the early adulthood traveling and exploration until I gained an education. It has been a sacrifice that has worked out for the better. Whilst a lot of my friends got to go backpacking around Europe at 20 and drank cheap champagne a top of the Eiffel Tower, many of them are back in Sydney and still rounding off their degrees. I used my degree to get a job in the US, fingers crossed I may be getting a new job in the UK with some great opportunities for extended transfer periods in Asia and greater Europe. I’ve used a career as a way of doing the backpacker exploration experience and by no means do I feel ready to pack in the traveling and exploration experience.


In my overseas travels I’ve managed to find myself a wonderful guy named Matt. Whilst I do like him, I not entirely ready to settle down, nor do I want a relationship to stop my overseas adventure. How thinks are going to pan out with Matt I’m not entirely sure. He’s very supportive of me going to the UK and following a career there and he recognizes that in the long term it is a great job as there is the option to transfer to a variety of locations throughout the world. For the moment he is committed to living in the US for the next 2 years. Spending 2 years here is not a sacrifice I’m willing to make. For the moment my big deal breaker is going to be the stifling of my career and traveling journey. In ten years time, I don’t want to regret not taking an opportunity to live in a lively European city and having the chance to widen my cultural experiences.

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