Harry
CibbuanoThe Slut-Stud Paradox
November 8th 2006 00:29
Take two adults, one a man the other a woman. Both have a veritable White Pages size list of previous sexual partners. The male is given a slap on the back and hailed a stud, the female is shamed and labeled a slut. Its an injustice that I’ve never been able to grasp. Why is it that society views sexual partners as conquests for males and precious commodities for females?
My only explanation is that it is some sort of natural evolutionary throwback. I’ve been lead to believe that the males natural urge is to spread his genes and to sire a new generation. The wider he casts the net, the greater the chance of spreading the genes. Females play the role of selection. They’re supposed to seek out the best and strongest genes to ensure a healthy and strong lineage.
So the biological mechanisms may explain why men may be inclined to play the field and women should be picky with their sexual selections. But we are far removed from the animal world. Sex isn’t just about creating a new generation and passing on our genes. The majority of sex we have in a lifetime isn’t performed with the intention of producing a child. Indeed, we’ll go to great lengths to ensure that conception doesn’t occur during many sexual encounters.
The natural instincts that drive sex may have evolved but the social attitudes are slow to catch on. Why should a woman who has had several sexual partners be looked down up and why should a promiscuous male be seen as a role model?
In the last few decades women have experiences steps towards greater sexual liberation. It all started with the Pill which enabled women to take greater measures of control in contraception. Whilst I wasn’t a huge fan of the TV series, ‘Sex and the City,’ I think it did amazing things for the public perception of woman and sex. That said, the show wasn’t without its critics. There continues to be those that will bash the show for depicting the shameful and tasteless sexual liberation of its female characters. Not only were these women single non-virgins, they didn’t even stick to missionary.
It seems we’ve taken baby steps towards eliminating the stud-slut paradox, however they remain tags associated with promiscuous behaviour. What are your thoughts? Why is it that men are studs and women are sluts? Are the connotations ever destined to change?
My only explanation is that it is some sort of natural evolutionary throwback. I’ve been lead to believe that the males natural urge is to spread his genes and to sire a new generation. The wider he casts the net, the greater the chance of spreading the genes. Females play the role of selection. They’re supposed to seek out the best and strongest genes to ensure a healthy and strong lineage.
So the biological mechanisms may explain why men may be inclined to play the field and women should be picky with their sexual selections. But we are far removed from the animal world. Sex isn’t just about creating a new generation and passing on our genes. The majority of sex we have in a lifetime isn’t performed with the intention of producing a child. Indeed, we’ll go to great lengths to ensure that conception doesn’t occur during many sexual encounters.
The natural instincts that drive sex may have evolved but the social attitudes are slow to catch on. Why should a woman who has had several sexual partners be looked down up and why should a promiscuous male be seen as a role model?
In the last few decades women have experiences steps towards greater sexual liberation. It all started with the Pill which enabled women to take greater measures of control in contraception. Whilst I wasn’t a huge fan of the TV series, ‘Sex and the City,’ I think it did amazing things for the public perception of woman and sex. That said, the show wasn’t without its critics. There continues to be those that will bash the show for depicting the shameful and tasteless sexual liberation of its female characters. Not only were these women single non-virgins, they didn’t even stick to missionary.
It seems we’ve taken baby steps towards eliminating the stud-slut paradox, however they remain tags associated with promiscuous behaviour. What are your thoughts? Why is it that men are studs and women are sluts? Are the connotations ever destined to change?
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Comment by Joy
Comment by Ruth
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There seems to be a modern backlash counter-culture that has emerged over the last decade... the so called raunch culture. Now critics are up in arms that this new sexualisation of women is demeaning. Somewhere there must be a nice middle ground.
Comment by Anonymous
but now that women can work, and vote, and be involved in government, I think the main reason sexual liberation is still a few steps behind is that women still judge other women. I don't know why, but women just won't let go of that old-fashioned tendency to call any other woman who sleeps around a slut. and if they won't stop being judgmental, why would men?
also a bit off-topic. but I think that 'raunch culture' actually has nothing to do with sexuality ... it looks like sex, but really it's just another kind of consumerism. another image to buy things to fit into.
Comment by Ruth
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Comment by Anonymous
As a man, I don't mind the word slut and have no problem having a relationship with one - just tells me she is sexually open and adventurous.
Comment by Rosalie
Comment by silvertongue
You and I are members of the most sophisticated and complex species that inhabits this planet, we are individually intelligent beyond our own recognition. Through sex alone we have exploited so much more than what we assume nature intended. Hell its now a multi billion dollar industry even. Who is to say that a girl who enjoys variety is wrong compared to a guy who chooses the same? No one if you ask me. Its about respect for yourself and for the ones you make contact with, if it feels right to you, then it is right.
Comment by SteveOfNJ
It was incredible. I wanted to marry her and she wanted to marry me but her husband has too much control over her and even though he knew we were doing all these things and basically gave her permission, he saw her falling in love with me and pulled the plug. She just cannot get up the courage to leave him.
Any girls out there that would like this great, kinky life style please look me up. Seriously!