Harry
CibbuanoSome Tips, Tricks and Etiquette For Online Dating – Rule 1
July 4th 2006 00:55
If someone sends you a message and you’re not interested in their profile, what should you do?
Checking your emails, you’ve just got word you’ve got a message from a fellow online dater. You log on to your dating site to checkout who’s picked you out of the bunch. Upon opening your private message or looking into their profile, it becomes apparent that this is not the type of person you want to be dating. Disappointing as it may be, now you have an unwanted message and admirer to deal with. So what do you do? Dare I say the modern trend is to simply ignore the message and in the cosy, anonymous world of cyberspace it is a very easy course of action to take.
Personally, I’m against this sort of behaviour. If you were in a public place, would you flatly ignore someone trying to grab your attention? Most likely not. Even some sleazy unwanted remark will usually envoke some sort of sharp reply. I can’t understand the logic behind ignoring messages from unwanted suitors. When someone sends a message, these sorts of things don’t get “lost in the mail.” Ignoring a message sends a pretty clear and blunt message that you’re not interested or for that matter regard the sender as worthy of a reply. Yet it seems like people opt for the silent treatment thinking that it is somehow nicer and less rude than a negative reply. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
I think any message is worthy of a reply. It only takes thirty seconds to compose a short “thanks, but I don’t think we are suited” style response. If you have been offended by the message you received, by all means let the sender know. By responding you are giving a clear indication that rude and offensive methods of picking up online daters is not on. Fail to respond and it is most likely that they’ll move on to other profiles with the same tactics making the online community less pleasant for everybody.
The other thing to consider is how you would feel from their side of the screen. Approaching anybody always takes courage. If someone has sent you a heartfelt message, not replying is a very weak way of letting them know that you’re not interested. Instead, take some time to formulate a sincere reply and explain why you don’t think you are a good match. Some sort of an explanation will make the rejection so much easier for the sender. There’s no need to ridicule, be rude or ignore. Afterall, you’re all a part of the online dating community for a common reason.
Checking your emails, you’ve just got word you’ve got a message from a fellow online dater. You log on to your dating site to checkout who’s picked you out of the bunch. Upon opening your private message or looking into their profile, it becomes apparent that this is not the type of person you want to be dating. Disappointing as it may be, now you have an unwanted message and admirer to deal with. So what do you do? Dare I say the modern trend is to simply ignore the message and in the cosy, anonymous world of cyberspace it is a very easy course of action to take.
Personally, I’m against this sort of behaviour. If you were in a public place, would you flatly ignore someone trying to grab your attention? Most likely not. Even some sleazy unwanted remark will usually envoke some sort of sharp reply. I can’t understand the logic behind ignoring messages from unwanted suitors. When someone sends a message, these sorts of things don’t get “lost in the mail.” Ignoring a message sends a pretty clear and blunt message that you’re not interested or for that matter regard the sender as worthy of a reply. Yet it seems like people opt for the silent treatment thinking that it is somehow nicer and less rude than a negative reply. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
I think any message is worthy of a reply. It only takes thirty seconds to compose a short “thanks, but I don’t think we are suited” style response. If you have been offended by the message you received, by all means let the sender know. By responding you are giving a clear indication that rude and offensive methods of picking up online daters is not on. Fail to respond and it is most likely that they’ll move on to other profiles with the same tactics making the online community less pleasant for everybody.
The other thing to consider is how you would feel from their side of the screen. Approaching anybody always takes courage. If someone has sent you a heartfelt message, not replying is a very weak way of letting them know that you’re not interested. Instead, take some time to formulate a sincere reply and explain why you don’t think you are a good match. Some sort of an explanation will make the rejection so much easier for the sender. There’s no need to ridicule, be rude or ignore. Afterall, you’re all a part of the online dating community for a common reason.
| 85 |
| Vote |
subscribe to this blog
