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Ten Tips for Surviving Living with Your Boyfriend

August 30th 2006 00:01

0) Leave the toilet seat up???

1) Guys have clothes and an increasing array of toiletry items. Don’t take over the wardrobe and bathroom cabinets. Make sure there’s equality in the storage space department.

2) Guys are notorious for forgetting to show their appreciation. When you’re living with someone it’s pretty easy to forget to do the little things that show you care. It doesn’t mean that he loves you any less than he did before you moved in together.

3) Don’t behave like a mother. Getting all possessive and wanting to know where you boyfriend is, what he’s doing, who he’s with and when he’ll be home is a sure fire way to cause a ton of relationship friction. If you trusted him before you moved in, there’s no reason to not trust him post moving in together.


4) Make sure the lines of communication stay open. Nip any problems or niggly issues in the bud. Don’t let them build up.

5) Be willing to compromise. A relationship is all about give and take. Living together is a stark reminder of the small sacrifices and concessions that need to be made if you want to remain together. Equally, there should be compromise on his behalf too.

6) Split the bills. If one partner is financially supporting the other it can lead to all sorts of ammunition should the situation turn sour. There are few excuses to not pull weight when it comes to paying the bills. You should always aim to keep some sort of financial independence.

7) Before you move in together set down some ground rules or standards so you each know what you’re going into before its too late. Talk them through and come to an agreement on them. Discuss everyday things such as cooking, grocery shopping, tv usage, phone and internet needs, private time etc.


8) Take a few trial runs before committing to a lease arrangement. Go on a few holidays together or try to arrange living under the same roof for a month with either with some friends or a short term rental arrangement.

9) Discuss visitations from friends and family. It’s inevitable that at some stage you’ll be having guests that the other doesn’t get along with. Some friends and families feel that it is their right to arrive unannounced and help themselves to your space, time and fridge. Get some ground rules squared for how visitations are to be handled.

10) Avoid smothering. Getting some time away from each other remains an important part of any relationship. Don’t cut ties with your friends. One of the ultimate killers of a relationship is spending too much time with each other. Getting away from your partner is a good way of getting balance and putting any issues into perspective.

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5 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by jon

August 30th 2006 00:28
Super advice Ruth. You should start up your own counselling service. Good to see you put item 0 in there

I think if two people can go on a long holiday together (a couple of months) and survive then that's a good test to see if they will be able to live together.

Comment by Ruth

August 30th 2006 02:41
Aww, shucks. Thanks Jon.

The extended holiday is a super way of determining couple compatability. Unfortunately, not everyone can shedule the luxury of month long holidays. Even a few weekends away in a self contained living environment can reveal a lot.


Comment by Anonymous

September 15th 2006 05:00
Wow, this was an interesting experience.

The guy's tips for moving in are all simple, and the girl's tips are all complicated things like lease agreements and establishing ground rules.


There are definitely some sexist assumptions in the mix somewhere here. Though then again how could there not be when you give two different lists for each gender?

Comment by Anonymous

October 6th 2010 17:51
Thanks for the advice.

Comment by Anonymous

November 6th 2010 14:19
Wow, it seem lykk the girls have to stay out of the way for the guy but they dont have to for us. but hey dont jus move in without expecting some kind of alltication.

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