Harry
CibbuanoTop Ten Dating Tips
May 15th 2006 02:21
Try out these tips if the dating scene is getting you down.
1. For those that feel they are in a string of disaster dates, remember that dating is an adventure.
Somewhere along the way we got so serious about the whole business of dating. One bad date does not define who you are. If you hold the idea of dating as one big adventure, you will lessen the pressure and relax a little more.
2. For those that are lacking self confidence, build a box of reassuring evidence.
If you are nervous about meeting people, you need reminders that you are wonderful. Save every note, postcard, medal, and treasured word you have received from someone and put it in a box. Take them out and read them before you are going out on a date. You need to be reminded that other people are happy to spend time with you, and that you have much to offer.
3. For those who want to give up, remember you can find love.
Believe and know that there is someone wonderful out there for you. Do not listen to the voices of others who say otherwise. All the good ones are not gone. It’s just a matter of time and patience.
4. Boost yourself esteem and do something sincere for others.
Being kind to others, demonstrating compassion, and showing people that you care about them is as important for you as it is for them. You don't have to be a "pleaser" but make a generous gesture to someone everyday and notice how good you feel. Just a sincere compliment is a gift to people.
5. Do what's right.
In a time when cynicism and depression can creep into our lives, we are tempted to think and say, "What difference does it make?" Well actually, it makes a difference to you if you noticed something is not right and you need to "right it." Do what's right, even when it doesn't matter.
6. Develop your authenticity.
Polish, cherish, and live your authentic life. Be your one-of-a-kind self. No one can be you; no one can replace you. Find your style, mission, purpose, gifts, and values. Therein resides who you are.
7. Don't settle.
This is a big one. Too many people get scared and settle for someone who is less than they want. Fear of being alone can drive people to make choices that are unsuitable for them. Dating takes courage. Courage to keep going out there to meet people, and courage to hold out until you meet the one for you.
8. Know your deal breakers.
Everyone has a list of "must-have" requirements, they just usually don't know it. It is their hidden agenda. Bring those qualities into the forefront that you must have in a partner in order for a relationship to work. If you don't know what they are, get a coach or counselor to help you discover them.
9. Do your best to look your best.
Looking good is important, but just as important is looking good and then forgetting about it. Do not obsess about your appearance once you have done everything you can do. It's important that when you go out on a date, you show up...not just a shell wearing some new clothes. That means that you are available to listen, share, and notice the good in someone.
10. Who said it would be easy?
Dating is hard work, the partner of our dreams going fall from the sky into your lap. Dating isn’t like a job, it shouldn’t tedious, but it does require some form of effort. You have to put yourself out there, get involved in the community and at times wear your heart on your sleeve. Meeting new people and evaluating whether you want to be with them or not, while they are evaluating you, can be a little stressful.
1. For those that feel they are in a string of disaster dates, remember that dating is an adventure.
Somewhere along the way we got so serious about the whole business of dating. One bad date does not define who you are. If you hold the idea of dating as one big adventure, you will lessen the pressure and relax a little more.
2. For those that are lacking self confidence, build a box of reassuring evidence.
If you are nervous about meeting people, you need reminders that you are wonderful. Save every note, postcard, medal, and treasured word you have received from someone and put it in a box. Take them out and read them before you are going out on a date. You need to be reminded that other people are happy to spend time with you, and that you have much to offer.
3. For those who want to give up, remember you can find love.
Believe and know that there is someone wonderful out there for you. Do not listen to the voices of others who say otherwise. All the good ones are not gone. It’s just a matter of time and patience.
4. Boost yourself esteem and do something sincere for others.
Being kind to others, demonstrating compassion, and showing people that you care about them is as important for you as it is for them. You don't have to be a "pleaser" but make a generous gesture to someone everyday and notice how good you feel. Just a sincere compliment is a gift to people.
5. Do what's right.
In a time when cynicism and depression can creep into our lives, we are tempted to think and say, "What difference does it make?" Well actually, it makes a difference to you if you noticed something is not right and you need to "right it." Do what's right, even when it doesn't matter.
6. Develop your authenticity.
Polish, cherish, and live your authentic life. Be your one-of-a-kind self. No one can be you; no one can replace you. Find your style, mission, purpose, gifts, and values. Therein resides who you are.
7. Don't settle.
This is a big one. Too many people get scared and settle for someone who is less than they want. Fear of being alone can drive people to make choices that are unsuitable for them. Dating takes courage. Courage to keep going out there to meet people, and courage to hold out until you meet the one for you.
8. Know your deal breakers.
Everyone has a list of "must-have" requirements, they just usually don't know it. It is their hidden agenda. Bring those qualities into the forefront that you must have in a partner in order for a relationship to work. If you don't know what they are, get a coach or counselor to help you discover them.
9. Do your best to look your best.
Looking good is important, but just as important is looking good and then forgetting about it. Do not obsess about your appearance once you have done everything you can do. It's important that when you go out on a date, you show up...not just a shell wearing some new clothes. That means that you are available to listen, share, and notice the good in someone.
10. Who said it would be easy?
Dating is hard work, the partner of our dreams going fall from the sky into your lap. Dating isn’t like a job, it shouldn’t tedious, but it does require some form of effort. You have to put yourself out there, get involved in the community and at times wear your heart on your sleeve. Meeting new people and evaluating whether you want to be with them or not, while they are evaluating you, can be a little stressful.
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